So this week last summer was a tough one as I started a couple of days ago. Once Chad and Kimmie arrived I took a back seat for a day so I could regroup and figure how to move forward with all that was happening. We decided not to bring mom home for the last week, I couldn't have handled it if she left us at the house. I can't imagine still living there, and when I stated that it occurred to my dad the same. I do think it was best for her to be in the IPU with constant assistance and med control. She fought to get out of that bed, I mean to the point that Kimmie could no longer stand near the bed because mom could have kicked her in her preggo belly. At one point Chad had to restrain her arms and legs by leaning over the bed spread eagle.
Mom was never I mean never without a family member in her room. Dad took the 6pm-2 am shift Chad and Kimmie would take the 2-10 am shift and I had the 10am-6pm shift. Judy our neighbor would come with Dad most times and I had Gail or one of moms friends with me so it was not hard to sit there. From Monday to Friday the RN's couldn't get the meds just right to help mom relax, she was laying back on her elbows the whole time, at times she would sit up and rock back and forth. She also had moments I mean seconds of clarity, when she would hear one of our voices she would almost light up. Once there was a smile and it was the craziest thing, because for days nothing and then Chad laughed and she knew it was him so she smiled.
Finally Friday the 17th mom started to relax, I knew the end was coming but I was okay. I came in on Friday with one of her best friends Sandy who flew out to see her and say goodbye. sandy told mom that when she gets up to heaven make the biggest ruckus ever so Sandy would know that she was okay. Grace and Bern and Harley our neighbors from CA came also and Grace had lost her husband earlier in the year, Grace asked mom if she had seen Arthur yet ans mom shook her head no, the next day Grace asked her again and mom nodded yes. CRAZY !!!! Grace cried even harder and told mom to tell to take her hand. Mind you the passing process in the brain takes a while so mom had been back and forth for a few days. She had been talking to her brother Michael and he mom Bessie for I think three days, like they were in the room. She asked Michael to get out of her room at one point ( the have both passed) years ago. Saturday I came in for my shift and I remember mom snoring so loudly Gail and I were laughing at her. Larry and Laura mom's cousin had drove in and we were all hanging in the room laughing and telling our memories of all the thing my mom did and said. We all had lunch and were chatting and one of the CNA's came in to reposition her, she stopped snoring. I remember thinking cool now she is resting completely off of her arms, she looked so peaceful. At around 6:00 I was expecting Dad to walk in but he didn't until 6:20 and we all told him your late! we are docking your pay. dad said hello and sat down no sooner, I looked at mom and her chest was not moving I looked harder. I said " she isn't breathing. Gail left to get the nurse, I stood and took moms hand ( I never thought I could do that) and the nurse came in and listened.. no breath, but a faint heartbeat. I called Chad and Kimmie and Grace. Laura and Larry and Gail were there. Larry started humming a hymn and we consoled Dad and the nurse called the time. She was gone... so in her way no bells or whistles. Mom waited for Dad to get there and said bye. We said a prayer together and made sure dad was sitting and I started the phone calls. I was okay through most of them until I got to my god mother who is moms oldest girlfriend. and Amanda my best friend.
I wasn't able to get a hold of Sandy to tell her mom was gone until Sunday evening. This is how it went: Sandy? Cecily. " Please this isn't the call is it? Yes. She came did it.. did what? Made noise at 2 or 3 am I sat up because a loud noise startled me out of my sleep.. It was her she did it She is fine. You know that she is fine.
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